3 Word Prompt- Take Me Home

"Take Me Home" I said to my car, after a long day I know I was ready to sit in my bed and let my head rest.

I think after all this time I realized how important my home really is to me, my safe space, and my alone time. Today was more of a rough day than we were expecting.

I had a great weekend, time full of friends, family and becoming more comfortable with who I am, what I like to do and focusing on what is most important to me. Nature and spending time outside, they always allow me the space to heal.

On the way back home I knew that I was struggling to stay postive and myself because I had not had time to myself, where I am not met with anyones expectations of me, nor do I feel like I have to wear any mask. That is something that I am still working on, taking off my mask around people who mean the most to me. Some of them know about the things that I hide from others, even myself sometimes.

"Do you want me to turn this off" she asked me. I didn't, even though I was feeling stress and disgust, I was okay with the trigger for the first time in a while. I got frusturated with the novel because of the way the mom responded, an even bigger trigger. Denial of what happened. That is what hurt more than hearing about the trauma that child experienced.

Take me home- I am home within myself, I noticed myself go into my shell and that is okay, I was reminding my body that I am home and that I am safe within myself. No one is going to hurt me anymore.

That is why I had such a hard time with sleepovers growing up, I always wanted my mom to Take Me Home. Eventually, my parents stopped letting me have sleepovers because I wasn't able to stay overnight places.

Even to this day, when I am going to bed in a space where people are sleeping that I do not know well or if I haven't slept there before I do not trust fully going to bed. I wait until I hear them snoring and sleeping and then feel as though I can go to bed.

I know at the end of the day that I can do and be is in the moment and let go of my past self. I am letting people in and the more people know that I am worries the more they can make an effort to ensure that I am safe, and so can I.

I take myself home, to my true self, authentically, whenever I can. I take care of myself and Take Me Home has a new meaning when home is yourself not a physical space.